Thirteen years of being a Mother…. Amazing I have done it…Successfully till now (that’s what I think). Never in my wildest dreams had I ever thought that I would be a Mom. Infact, when I became a Mom I was shocked, I did not know why people around me were thrilled and I was so confused, I guess it was my age 22… too young. I still wonder when I watch movies and I see expectant mothers beam with pride, I just can’t relate to that emotion even now… I guess its different with different Moms.
I was so immature then, but I guess that immaturity made my daughter feel comfortable as we both perceived the world in a similar manner. We could shout, scream, cry, laugh without thinking twice. I could never spank her, when she was wrong, as I just couldn’t do it. I would reason with her and my folks thought I was crazy, they still tell me she would have been different if I was more like a Mom (Rule with the rod and breath fire like a dragon) to her than like someone her age. Somehow, that did not appeal to me then nor does it now. Even today if I shout at her and she cries I cry along, the whole purpose is defeated. I don’t know how it just happens.
But I guess with all that my kiddo (Rithika, I call her Titu – she dislikes that) has still turned out to be a fine little girl, good looking, intelligent, creative and a whacky sense of humor (she had no hope having a mom like me) on the whole a wonderful human being, though she has her own mood swings which I attribute to raging hormones (normal at her age) her anger which is quite annoying, she can scream and shatter glass, she can argue till the cows come home and when she is affectionate she can smother and kill with love. I like her the way she is minus her anger everything is fine.
Her being in my life brought about a lot love, stability, tolerance and a purpose. Stability because I am such a freedom freak, I hate control of any kind; emotional control is the worst of them all. When Titu was born I still had a Teen’s mindset, she taught me to think beyond myself, she taught me how important it is for someone you love to spend time with them and nothing can make up for that time. Now I come running back home from work just to be with her and we talk endlessly, she tells me what happened at School (by the way Schools are more happening than what they were then) and I tell her about Office (gossips as usual) and we talk our way into the night, till my Mom shouts out that we need sleep as we have an early morning the next day.
It’s a nice feeling of seeing your kid go through different phases of life, at times you feel like pulling your hair apart, you learn to laugh without any reason, you can dance without music, sometimes you wish you could use a mind probe to check what’s happening in their little brain, but on the whole it’s a wonderful experience. Kids manage to make you go through every emotion in the world (whether you are ready for it or not) that a human being could possibly experience in one lifetime. At times they also manage to bring out the best and not to forget the worst in you…. They are talented enough to make you experience enlightenment…. …
I feel I am gradually levitating to that level…
Some of my favorite quotes…
Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. ~Pearl S. Buck
A daughter is a day brightener and a heart warmer. ~Author Unknown
Daughters are like flowers, they fill the world with beauty, and sometimes attract pests. ~Author Unknown
I was so immature then, but I guess that immaturity made my daughter feel comfortable as we both perceived the world in a similar manner. We could shout, scream, cry, laugh without thinking twice. I could never spank her, when she was wrong, as I just couldn’t do it. I would reason with her and my folks thought I was crazy, they still tell me she would have been different if I was more like a Mom (Rule with the rod and breath fire like a dragon) to her than like someone her age. Somehow, that did not appeal to me then nor does it now. Even today if I shout at her and she cries I cry along, the whole purpose is defeated. I don’t know how it just happens.
But I guess with all that my kiddo (Rithika, I call her Titu – she dislikes that) has still turned out to be a fine little girl, good looking, intelligent, creative and a whacky sense of humor (she had no hope having a mom like me) on the whole a wonderful human being, though she has her own mood swings which I attribute to raging hormones (normal at her age) her anger which is quite annoying, she can scream and shatter glass, she can argue till the cows come home and when she is affectionate she can smother and kill with love. I like her the way she is minus her anger everything is fine.
Her being in my life brought about a lot love, stability, tolerance and a purpose. Stability because I am such a freedom freak, I hate control of any kind; emotional control is the worst of them all. When Titu was born I still had a Teen’s mindset, she taught me to think beyond myself, she taught me how important it is for someone you love to spend time with them and nothing can make up for that time. Now I come running back home from work just to be with her and we talk endlessly, she tells me what happened at School (by the way Schools are more happening than what they were then) and I tell her about Office (gossips as usual) and we talk our way into the night, till my Mom shouts out that we need sleep as we have an early morning the next day.
It’s a nice feeling of seeing your kid go through different phases of life, at times you feel like pulling your hair apart, you learn to laugh without any reason, you can dance without music, sometimes you wish you could use a mind probe to check what’s happening in their little brain, but on the whole it’s a wonderful experience. Kids manage to make you go through every emotion in the world (whether you are ready for it or not) that a human being could possibly experience in one lifetime. At times they also manage to bring out the best and not to forget the worst in you…. They are talented enough to make you experience enlightenment…. …
I feel I am gradually levitating to that level…
Some of my favorite quotes…
Some mothers are kissing mothers and some are scolding mothers, but it is love just the same, and most mothers kiss and scold together. ~Pearl S. Buck
A daughter is a day brightener and a heart warmer. ~Author Unknown
Daughters are like flowers, they fill the world with beauty, and sometimes attract pests. ~Author Unknown
